Greetings..
I recently finished a book that was life changing for
me. It came to me at a time in my life
when I needed some fundamental guidance.
I would recommend that every woman read this book, especially if you
have children. There are things in this
book that will help you to understand yourself as a woman and (in my opinion)
may even help you to become a better mother.
The name of the book is
The Feminine Mystique; it was written in 1963 by a woman named Betty Friedan, a
working mother of 3. She was one of the
pioneers of the Women’s movement; she was also the founder of NOW (National
Organization for Women, 1966). She
graduated from college as a Psychology major, but went into journalism and
writing instead. She wrote freelance articles for Women’s magazines as a part
time career to supplement her husband’s income. The book is about women’s role
in society; women are taught from a very young age, that our sole purpose in
life should be to grow up, find a husband and have children; we are suppose to
live our lives only for our families-to have no other identity other than
homemaker, wife, mother and in this role we should find total, complete and
utter fulfillment. Much of Friedan’s
research was based on facts, studies, and statistics from anthropologists,
sociologists, psychologists and personal interviews with hundreds of
women.
The “Feminine Mystique”
is this: everything woman are taught
from society tells us what our identity should be- because it serves a purpose
in our society- however, our minds and bodies are telling us this is not what
our sole purpose should be. We have a lot more to offer society.
In the 1950’s many were
women, mostly housewives, were becoming severely depressed, feelings of
“emptiness”, a longing for something more, and asking themselves, “Is this all
there is to life?” They would go to
their doctor (primarily men back then).
The doctors were dumbfounded at what would be causing this epidemic
among women. The doctors assumed there
was something mentally wrong with them; they had what every woman wanted- a
husband, children and a home. These
women were put on some type of anti-depressant; the symptoms were not getting
better, some women even ended their lives.
Freud’s theory was the
reason that women wanted to seek fulfillment in having their own identity,
other than through their husband or children, was because they had
“penis-envy”. This is ridiculous. That we seek other means of fulfillment in
our lives because we don’t have a penis? Well, I do have to admit women probably were
jealous of what men were allowed to accomplish in society back then. For me, working is like part of who I
am. My work makes me feel whole. It really is a wonderful feeling to know that
I don’t have to depend on anyone else, financially. Financial
security is one of the things I value most, 3rd only to my
relationship with God and my friends and family. Working gives a person a
feeling of satisfaction and self confidence in knowing that they are not only contributing
to their own lives, but the lives of their families and to society. I can only imagine what it must have been like
back then for women.
This book really is
fascinating. There will be more to come
in my next post. Friedan writes about
what mother’s do to ensure their children become independent successful adults
in life. Stay tuned for part II, or
better yet….get started and read the book!! I would love to hear your
perspective!
Thanks for taking the
time!
God Bless,
Dana